project 99% done. Alhamdullilah, everything's over now.

monday, interview
tuesday, critique.

alright then

3 more days, then is over.

and as usual,i'm not working as hard as i can.

Saturday Afternoon- Malay Script Writing Competition@ National Library.

this was pretty last minute but i went there with K to support his friends. writing for a stage drama and writing for a tv script is entirely different. it was hard trying to understand a script written for stage drama because what the writers want to convey is not straight forward. very interesting time though.and the view from national library was spectacular.


feeling comfortable there my friend?

hahahah


there will never be a picture perfect.hahah spoiler.


alright then, 5 more days to submission!woohoo!

what would you do without me huh...

if you cant see my worth, then someone else will.

The 10 Most Common Reasons for Relationship Breakups

Human Sexuality (2nd Edition) by Roger Hock is the source of these relationship problems – this book contains everything you need to know about intimate relationships!

1. Breaking promises, lying, cheating in relationships. These obvious violations of trust almost always result in relationship problems. If the basic trust in a love relationship is repeatedly broken, the problems accumulate and the motivation to stay together decreases. Couples in loving relationships can learn to reconcile their differences – and even survive an affair – without anger or bitterness.

2. Imbalance of power in relationships. Problems for couples arise when one partner has more decision-making power than the other. When one person makes all the decisions about activities, friends, financial matters, household matters, and vacations, the relationship can become unstable. Both partners should equally share the decision-making power.

3. Acceptance of stereotypes in relationships. This used to be a more common relationship problem for couples, but it still exists today! Mistaken gender myths include beliefs such as “Men should earn more money than women” or “Women should stay at home and raise the kids.” If couples believe these stereotypes, they create false expectations that are more likely to be a cause of a break up.

4. Isolation from friends and family. This type of relationship problem is based on fear and insecurity; new couples may isolate themselves from other people because they’re “in love and want to be together.” A brief period of cocooning is normal for many couples, but it’s far healthier to interact with other people regularly.

5. Lack of self-knowledge for couples. If one or both partners aren’t in tune with their interests, needs, desires, future plans, goals, values, and preferences, then it’s difficult for them to build a healthy relationship. Self-knowledge helps partners communicate who they are and what they want – which can prevent all types of relationship problems.

6. Low self-esteem, insecurity, and lack of self-confidence. Couples can break up because one partner feels unworthy of being loved. This insecurity can lead to possessiveness and dependence, which isn’t healthy for couples in love relationships.

7. Excessive jealousy in relationships. “Jealousy is cited as one of the most frequent causes of the breakup of romantic relationships,” writes Roger Hock. Delusional jealousy can trigger abuse and violence, which can (and should) cause a relationship breakup! Delusional jealousy isn’t a common type of relationship problem, but normal jealousy can be.

8. Ineffective communication in relationships. Both partners need to be able to share their thoughts, feelings, opinions, values, needs, frustrations, and joys. Sometimes couples avoid speaking honestly and hide their true selves, which may not always lead to a break up…but it doesn’t strengthen their bond!

9. Control issues in relationships. If one partner is trying to control or manipulate the other, the relationship can become weak or destructive. Controlling behaviors include checking up on the partner, name-calling, threatening the partner, requiring the partner to check in all the time, or not allowing any deviations from the schedule. This may not lead to relationship break up for all couples, but it is a sign of an unhealthy relationship.

10. Violent behavior in relationships. This is an obvious relationship problem that should lead to an immediate break up! Physical, sexual, and emotional abuse are attempts to gain total control over a partner. Though relationships like this should end immediately, couples stay
couples stay together stay for various reasons.

i could look really fine on the outside but the truth is, i've been holding it all up.

i'm feeling rather disheartened.

my back is killing me!!!

Should you not gain your wants, my soul, then be not grieved;
But hasten to that banquet which your Lord's bequeathed.

And when a thing for which you ask is slow to come,
Then know that often through delay are gifts received.

Find solace in privation and respect its due,
For only by contentment is the heart relieved.

And know that when the trials of life have rendered you
Despairing of all hope, and of all joy bereaved,

Then shake yourself and rouse yourself from heedlessness,
And make pure hope a meadow that you never leave.

Your Maker's gifts take subtle and uncounted forms.
How fine the fabric of the world His hands have weaved.

The journey done, they came to the water of life,
And all the caravan drank deep, their thirst relieved.

Far be it from the host to leave them thirsty there,
His spring pours forth all generosity received.

My Lord, my trust in all Your purposes is strong,
That trust is now my shield; I'm safe, and undeceived.

All those who hope for grace from You will feel Your rain;
Too generous are You to leave my branch unleaved.

May blessings rest upon the loved one, Muhammad,
Who's been my means to high degrees since I believed.

He is my fortress and my handhold, so my soul,
Hold fast, and travel to a joy still unconceived.

~~~

[Originally written in Arabic by Al-Habib 'Ali bin Husayn al-Habshi. Translated by Shaykh Abdal Hakim Murad]

MeditationMix by our brother Haroon Sellars : "Oh My Soul"

- taken from Sis Muna's FB. thank you, hope you dont mind,

i seriously cannot wait for the 29th. 9 more days and that's it for Year 2.
i've got so many places in mind to go.
so kat, hamie, rf, queen, let's have milkshake!if you know what i mean..

weekend was a bliss. i wished monday wouldnt come.

saturday was with K, had a really fulfilling dinner at pizza hut since i was cravings for their chicken wings.

sunday was with the sec friends, shisha @ mosi. it was good seeing the guys again, always with their new jokes and stupid games. snap twist!haha.

alright back to reality.2 more weeks to submission and is all over!i just cant wait to be over and done with 3dviz.

has been staring at the computer screen since 1130am and time check,904pm.
i am mentally tired.hate hate hate submissions,my life for another year would be like this. just another year!!sick or no sick, project still goes on.so looking forward for 29th. this time, i'm not gonna be a goody two shoes and hand in everything.i see if it works for me, if not then goodbye.

29TH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!






ps/: i want to be free from everything.

the last two years, i really know what i wanted to do,i was really sure, until i got myself into this. i forgot about it, put on hold, and maybe thought i wasnt going to make it. after what happened, i was not sure if i could get what i dreamed of.my confidence level after secondary school life was from 10 to 1.

but today, my lecturer told me to go for it.somehow,in her eyes, she believed that i can do it and i have stopped believing in myself for quite a while.

today, i am and very sure what i want in life. in 2020, i really want to see myself doing it. i must stop being afraid and must stop losing my self believe. i've been afraid and coward for so long and i want it to stop. if you dream small, you get small. if you dream big, you get big. there is no way to head towards success if i dream small, if i just be content and okay-ed with the way things are. God will help us,if we help ourselves, i believed that.

but this journey is not wasted, i will make use of it in the future.

btw, here's a quote from the movie coach carter which i watched during the weekend:
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

"adulthood is about making decisions and living in the consequences"
maybe that is what i'm doing right now.

Thurday Afternoon- Mam's 48th Bday@ Carousel, Royal Scotts Hotel





i took two plates at once.hah.


dad act cute.

mam and dad.

chocolate fondue. the chocolate is so rich, i love it.

haha!





it was such a good memorable day, spending the time with the family. i love you guys!

wow, i want this. this is at dubai btw. bid starts from 20 million, dont know what currency though. so awak, ada 20 million tak?

If you make intense supplication
and the timing of the answer is delayed,
do not despair of it.
His reply to you is guaranteed;
but in the way He chooses,
not the way you choose,
and at the moment He desires,
not the moment you desire.
The Hikam by Ibn Ata'illah

i should be reminded of this everyday.must never get tired of praying..

we've got 4 weeks to finish a truckload of things and it's gonna be over. Goodbye Year 2, hello attachments, then hello Year 3.


missing those days when life was carefree, laughing and enjoying my time with my girlfriends. but reality check, i'm here now.

school is tomorrow, be strong my friends. last term for the year, sure is not gonna be easy.

2010, live life simply.

dont be judgemental.
less bitchin



ps/: i miss those halaqahs.i've said this a lot of times.

how i spent the new year 01/01/10

930pm.yewtee.K.runny nose.sick.fireworks cancelled.tiongbahru.mcd.cabbed.mount faber country club.his friends.bowling.1252am.on the road.ecp highway.my sister.her boyfriend.2010.missed the fireworks.changi beach.roti john.sit&chill.4.30am.home.

2009-

i dont know where to start but i guess here it is. 2009, has been the same old, just like 2008. maybe because firstly, i am still stuck doing things that i have little passion of. i've accepted the fact, i worked hard, but not hard enough, i tried to stay on the track, tried to get my work done, tried to get enough scores and this has been 2009 for me basically. i have been dealing this for the past and a half year. my time in ID to me, is not a waste. it is hard but it is something different, something that i never thought i would do. eventhough i have a little passion of, i do not want to regret and i believe it will benefit me in the end. i believe everything happens for a reason, and with this, i held on to strongly. to my 4 girlfriends, RF,Kat, Hammie and Queen, thanks for being there for me, thanks for making school easier for me. you guys taught me the true meaning of friendship. what kind of friend you are. this year, you girls taught me, generosity, kindness(i am not kind-hearted), sharing and thinking of others before you. thank you, i love you all.

school aside. it has been two years since i know you. there were good and bad things that happened this year to us, just like any normal relationship. you are the greatest person i have ever met. you are you, smart, wise, cheeky, serious, loyal, responsible, cool, relax, living your life for your own, the things that i didnt expect to love. you made me realised things about myself, things that i have been denying. you tell me that there is more to this relationship, to tell me to enjoy my life with my friends, which i really love that about you. you didnt make our relationship the center of your life(maybe close to the center, haha and afterall we are not husband&wife). this year, with you, the most important thing to me is to love someone for who they are, accept them flaws and all, be patient because patience will help the relationship. with that, i pray to God, wrong or right, just let our relationship be long lasting and guide us..

one last thing, for 2010, i hope to live life simply. i am happy as for now.i am content, blessed and lucky.note to self: do not let anything get to me, let go of the unwanted things/feelings/emotions that doesnt benefit me, try to work harder for school, make my parents happy, just treasure each time i have with my loved ones and work my way towards being a good Muslimah, nonetheless.

may God bless you all :)