it's hard to leave my precious 2 months of holiday.school next week :/

on friday, i had a really good time shopping.i dont get to shop too often and i am "richer" only at a certain time of the year,sad i know.so it was just my cousin and I, on that day.i am so happy because i get everything that i wanted for that day,plus i didnt exceed my budget. to fiza, thanks for the dress you bought for me!!bestnyer dapat birthday present in advanced. :)

on saturday, i finally get to go on a date with my two best girlfriends, the double L, leha and lala. it was really good meeting them. we had dinner at popeye and had a really good conversation. girls, i really miss spending time with you.hope we'll meet soon, at the end of the year.

and today, jalan raya with my 4 girlsfriends!alright, i better go now.time to get ready.

ps/: wanna watch 500 days of summer with you.

i was talking to K the other day about how i find myself changing. when i was in secondary school, i was a sociable person.i will go around to the people i know and make conversations with them and just plainly being friendly. i was a friendly person back then, i still am. i loved socialising and talking to each different person. however, as i found my way to poly, i find myself not socialising, not being friendly enough(like how i used to)and not mixing with the others. i realised that i am no longer feel interested to know other people and i do not want to make conversation with people,pretending i like and am interested to get to know them. so i only go to the few that i really like and they like me too and we'll have conversations. i am becoming more appreciative with the people that are closer to me and they are enough. it is not that i am being arrogant or unfriendly, but i do not want to pretend that i like them.my feelings for others that i do not know are neutral.i realised, the more people you know, the more you gossip about people. i told K that i do not know if it is me or just the people there. K said it is me and he added "welcome to the adult world". maybe he's right. i do not know why i am acting like this. the people that i know in my course, they are generally okay, i have no problems with them and i do not dislike any of them. i do have friends that i genuinely like to get closer with, outside of my clique. i do, okay.but it's just a few.so if you DID people read my blog and you're not happen to be in my clique, it doesnt mean that i will no longer talk to you and please dont shun yourself away from me. i think it takes sincerity and time to get to know each other. if we happen to be friends for a lifetime, why not?

I have been really busy.the whole of last week was taken up.
monday-movie making with queen rf and hammie for kat's bday surprise
tuesday-celebrated kat's bday.watched ugly truth and had a relaxing dinner with a very nice view.
wednesday-meet up with K to do his Ns work.yes, i know,what ns work?
thursday- watched a movie again.phobia2.i did not want to watch it though but my movie tix was paid, so no complain right?
friday-raya open house
saturday-open house, K and his friends came over for raya.three of them stayed at my place till 3am in the morning.hahaha.poor you.you should just sleepover my place.
sunday- raya with K and his primary school friends.

by the way, i have 2 more weeks to school!!!!!like WTH!!i am not really looking forward.1.5 years to go and i dont know what will happened next.

okay and lastly
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.
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HAH!cheeeessssyyy. i know. pardon my boyfriend's unfriendly face.hahaha

Saturday-Open House

looking from the photos, i do have a lot of female cousins than male cousins.anyway, open house was so exhausting.it started from 12pm till 12am.my last guest was my neighbour.

maternal side.

fedre!so cute!

paternal side.

aiman!!so cute too right!i told my nephew,"come take a picture with me,if not i switch off the lights". apparently,he's afraid of the dark.hahah.

okay, 3 more weeks to school!OH FREAKING NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i like no doubt and i really like gwen stefani.the next time they come to singapore, i might consider watching them. and below this is the part of the lyrics of 4 in the morning.really like it.

You've got to give me everything
Nothing less cause
You know I give you all of me


I give you everything that I am
I'm handin' over everything that I've got
Cause I wanna have a really true love
Don't ever wanna have to go & give you up
Stay up till Four In The Morning & the tears are pouring
& I want to make it worth the fight
What have we been doing for all this time?
Baby if we're gonna do it, come on do it right

All I wanted was to know I'm safe
Don't want to lose the love I've found
Remember when you said that you would change
Don't let me down
It's not fair how you are
I can't be complete, can you give me more?
& all I know is
You got to give me everything
& nothing less cause
You know I give you all of me

it's not too late i guess to wish all my muslim friends and cousins, Salam Aidilfitri. I seek forgiveness from all of you, even to my non-muslim friends if i have hurt you in any ways.
this year theme colour for my family is ORANGE!

my bros got the wrong shade of orange.

Mam and I.

famously known as the M sisters plus mam.haha,mcm paham,"famously".


second day.my eye looked swollen.cause of contact lens :/


alright,so many raya outings to plan and go!!oh no!!

i am coming to 19 this year. i am not as matured,i am still capable of being childish.i dont live this world enough.i might not experience real pain or agony like some others do.i am pretty blessed.i might not know about this world enough.but dont underestimate me.i know somethings that you dont. you gotta accept that fact.you might know more than me.however,i dont live this life blindly so what you're saying is totally unfair.i've lived up to 19 years to know certain things about life too.i might know certain things that you dont even if it's just minor stuff that i know. ACCEPT THAT FACT. you make me feel stupid, feel like i've wasted my 19 years.i have experienced things that you dont experience before.please,just accept this fact and i will accept the fact that you know more than me.

i'v been busy.

friday- shopping at orchard with mam,sis and bro.breakfast @ al-falah mosque with family.it was good and i wished i could breakfast, terawih there again but it's kinda late right now.insyaAllah next year.
saturday- geylang with mam and sis in the afternoon,geylang with K and family at night.i spent almost 10 hours at geylang.i was really exhuasted by then. it will definitely be the first and the last.anyway, it was good spending time with your family :)
sunday-breakfast at madjack,bukit timah with Ccks friends. at last, i get to meet haikal for such a long time.dude, thanks for remembering me.
monday- the start of kuih making.since i was the only one helping my mam, i had to do almost everything.my mam and i did 4 types in a day.haha, my mam is a superwoman.
tuesday-kuih making part 2. breakfast with K at clementi to get wanton mee.i still prefer malay wanton mee.i dont like steam wanton as much as i like fried wanton.hahah,sorry awak.
wednesday-kuih-making part 3.terawih at last.
friday and saturday will be busy cleaning the house i guess. and then it's hari raya. how time flies ~

you know what..you can have everything in the world.you can be the most happiest person.but what if you're the only one who is happy and the people that surrounds you are not?i just realised.i can be really happy,but what if my happiness is short-lived because the people that i love is not happy?i mean, how can you be really really happy when you see your mam,dad,sister,husband,wife is not happy? that's why the most important thing for me in life is be happy and the people that circles me are happy too, at least.

Iftar with Cousins-

last Sunday,we decided to breakfast together and even though ada orang bubble, we still had fun! Ry, hoped you had a good birthday!








well, we were all late because we decided to drink teh tarik at 11pm.sib baik bulan puase takde hantu so aku tak takut sangat.

ps/: i yet to go geylang.probably be going this saturday to get headscarves and such.hai,dont feel like being in the crowd and it's gonna be really hot.

my template was screwed but i kinda like this too.

be back soon :)

the thing about me is i am a realist.i am not a dreamer. i do dream of certain things,like having a car,a home,a husband,a job.but if you realise,those things are realistic things.everyone is capable of achieving a car,a home,a husband,a job.everyone,means people,like in Singapore.i never once dream big,like dreaming of having my own business or doing something extraordinary.i have yet to pursue something that i'm really passionate about and i dont know what i am so passionate about,apart from K.when people do talk about their dreams, i do find it hard to believe that it will happen.it doesnt sound convincing enough to me.i just nod,give my support.even if i had an idea of doing something big,it will be off my mind soon enough cause,i dont believe 100 percent in it and it's entirely unconvincing,unachievable and unrealistic.it is sad,because i find that i will not succeed if i dont dream big.having dreams,will be part of your motivation to do well and succeed but i dont dream and i will not do well,i think if i just set myself up to realistic goals.the only advantage is i wont be disappointed if i dont achieve my dreams but what's disappointment? we faced that everyday in our lives.sure i can go through many many disappointments.so i decided from now onwards i try,i try to change my mindset.i try to dream a bit by bit and see how it goes..but changing your mindset is hard enough so we'll see how..but one thing for sure, i'll make sure my dreams of travelling and having my own kind of wedding and performing haj will be succeeded.InsyaAllah.Amin.

dear K,

I love you. i always love you, when i am angry, sad or happy, i love you.

truly,

M.

HAHA!i dont know where that came from.so random and cheesy.very cheesy but i feel like posting that.sorry y'all. dont puke on your screen.and K, please dont laugh at this.hahah.

sorry.i was bored.very very very bored.

hey hammie, i got to know paolo nutini from your tumblr.didnt expect him to sound older than he looks but nice songs!haha :)

alright, i know i have not been updating.what's there to update. currently having my holidays and i have 7 more weeks to school..oh God, what i am going to do.seriously, i am not enjoying as much but at least i should be thankful that ramadhan is during my holidays and i could fast at home and perform terawih prayers but other than that, i am just slacking at home.so there you go..story of my life.

quite recently, my cousin uploaded old pictures of us, during the childhood times. seeing the pictures, makes me reminisce but the thing about me, i have nothing much to reminisce cause i cant remember things too well. so pictures says a lot of things and i was thinking of how happy we used to be when we're younger.how close we are and still is. really really grateful and thankful that we didnt distance ourselves but as years go by, we became closer. looking at the pictures made me wish that i could go back to when i was younger.i was much much happier i guess.nothing critical happening in my life. all i know is to have fun. but now, as we grow, they are so many things to think about. for me it would be, my family, my school, my faith and you, definitely.i should be and i am glad that i am not a parent yet and my responsibility is not as heavy. it's just that i am just a tiny winy tired that some things didnt go the way i want it to be. but i learnt, what you want might not be the best for you. you never know what's best for you.. Only God knows it all.

alright pictures;

this was at melaka.ages ago.i was probably about 6,i dont know.i think is easy to guess which is me. i dont change much, i think. well except i got a really beautiful mole when i got older.hahah!

this was at west coast!!awww..how much i love this place. my heart still aches when i think about west coast. it was where i grew up..we're having satay convention, accoring to abg ajir. i was at the back with the peace sign.

this was at bedok, my cousin's place. one of the places filled with memories.i am in red.notice how i pout my lips. i did it again in the first picture.haha.

alright, now i am really free...no more school!

see you soon.

that's it. the end of semester 1.project's done and critique is next week.what's done is done.

happy fasting to everyone :)
May Allah bless you

i wanna finish everything by thursday!

lets update.we only have two more weeks to school,which means two more weeks to submission.i am just hoping to finish everything by next thursday.i wanna enjoy the night with K.remember that wednesday night?we were sitting quietly under the pavillion?i want the feeling when my love is by my side,and i, my mind is at ease, floating around and not thinking anything of particular. we both stare at the night's sky and watch time goes by,without saying any word.only occasionally when needed to.silence is golden and not all people can enjoy silence.i'm afraid,i learnt that from an introverted person.hmm,that would be so so good,and it will be my motivation to finish my work. so my dear friends, find your motivation,whatever it is :)

ps, thanks girls, for the charm bracelet.i remember last year,i keep rambling about getting a tiffany-look-alike charm.i totally forgot about it and there it was at my table when i came to school.i love you girls :)xoxo.and kat, thanks for the china souveniers and pen!!appreciate it a lot girls.

i was out shopping on friday.i at was charles and keith, well obviously looking for shoes when i saw a nude wedge/platform(i dont know how to describe it or what it is called)selling at 12.90!!i so wanted to buy it but then, there was this girl, she was deciding whether to buy it or not and she has the last pair of nude shoes!!so i, walked around charles and keith, aimlessly and spying on her.she took damn long to decide and i keep going in and out of the shop to see whether she has decided and she did buy the nude wedge/platform or whatever it is called!! at that moment, my heart breaks.this is much hurtful than my boyfriend not calling me. seriously.anyway, the last pair was size 38 and i dont think it fits well but what the heck!!

hai..i looked like some obsessed girl.anyway, thanks to my sister for paying the dress(assuming she didnt ask for the money back)and it felt better.

ps, i wished all public holidays fell on monday, that would be really good.aww..back to school tomorrow and i'm not looking forward for autocad!